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Owen Linder, MD, FACP posted a condolence
Friday, April 30, 2021
In requium
The last five years Harriett was in our oversight and supervisory care, whilst residing in
Inn on the Pond, then Inspired Living I got to know Harriett in much greater depth
than the few times we previously had occasions since Marcie and I married in 1984. Harriett had to live though the circumscribed and devolving stages of dementia. Marcie never gave up on her. Never stopped tending to her physical and emotional needs. For example she picked Inn on the Pond as it was only Jewish living facility in North Pinellas County. It served Kosher meals. When living there reached an impasse as the anti wandering measures were not state of the art, Marcie continued to bring the Jewish holidays to the Jewish residents of the more secure facility Inspired Living. Marcie and I used
my long years of geriatric treatment to guide Harriett's healthcare givers to a high standard. Marcie
threaded the needle of good care and available care. She deployed extra help liberally, without stinting.
Eventually we employed hospice for extra help. Harriett was resting peacefully all of last week. I saw her last Sunday. Marcia was in her room fifteen minutes before she slipped away.
For those of you who knew Harriett when she was fully alert, married, raising her three children Marcia, Louis and Phillip and living in Cincinnati and then Dayton I can add little to your recollections. For those of you who know of Harriett though Marcia and I the last five years particularly Leah, Joshua and Mitchell and her other two grandchildren Gabrielle and Avi I offer you the solace that life no matter what plane it is lived on is worth taking part in and supporting even as changes beyond our control occur.
In visits you saw Harriett devolved but the essential woman and grandmother taking in life as she could.
Last week Harriett had a pleasant smile on her face, arms peacefully folded across each other. Us in the room. When her favorite aide, Amber, came in the room Harriett opened out her arms to welcome Amber to the room and offer an embrace. Part of Harriett's inbred character was that such a gesture was earned through benevolent, warm repeated reciprocity. I will not get an opportunity to speak at the funeral Monday in Dayton; so I share this wonderful strongly colored dill flower which bloomed this week in my raised garden; this flower with a wonderful contrast of black and yellow concentric circles just coincidentally emblematic of a Sabra like character tough black on the outside and sweet yellow inside. No matter that Harriett lost much communicative ability in the five years since her spinal compression fractures and her aortic stenosis were treated, no matter that modern medicine extended her years through following years of less and less function, the essential character of Harriett Kaplan remained showing through in that one gesture of love and friendship to her friend of the last few years Amber. It is ok to remember Harriett as you saw her in the last years. She knew your presence. She accepted you and knew your presence.
Sincerely,
Owen